Well, I am having a normal day today. I woke up at 5:00 am to go to work. I was a little bit tired and sleepy, after all I slept only 4 hours, and it was raining and a bit and  cold outside.  Anyways, I got dressed, washed my face and went to work. It was really dark and the rain didn’t help either. At that hour, there is usually many bunnies around the road but not today. Maybe because it was raining and cold, thank god, the place where I work is not so far away from our house. It was lot of work to do and I even stay there 2 hours longer than I am normally scheduled, but its worthy since I get paid 200% more than normal for those extra hours. After work I went back home. Surprisingly, the sun was shining with not so many clouds. So, I didn’t have any trouble on the way home. When I finally got home, I put my keys and wallet away, changed my clothes and ate something. Then I sat on the couch with my laptop and relax for a bit… didn’t last long though. That was all so far till 2 pm. Maybe I will write the rest of my day later on. Right now, I am going to sleep for a couple hours and than play for a while something.

By the way, this is the place where I work:

I am excactly 11 weeks pregnant today according to the calculation done from the echo (ultrasound) that was done last week.

Im still sick all day if i don’t take my pills and still if I move around or get upset my stomach strongly starts protesting.  So I stay calm and in bed as much as possible. Today however  I went to the hospital to get my blood checked. o.o; I dont like needles… not one bit, but it needed to be done because of my pregnancy. They got 5 tubes with blood of me. I was doing fine but after that I decided to take it easy and sit down for just a few minutes at the hospital restaurant. I had a lil cup of chickensoup and after that we went home.

On the way home we stopped at the market and bought a few things I was needing. Ofcourse there where plenty of stalls. Its the Dappermarkt, the best market in Holland (and thats official). Theres many different kind of things you can buy there.. from fish to vegetables to chicken to fruit, bread, toys, clothes, make-up, tools, flowers and so much more. I didnt think of all the stalls where they sell fried food and as we passed them that smell was blown in my face and omg.. almost throw up right there on the street. I squeezed my nose and we walked quickly past it.. me constantly asking Antonio if the smell was gone yet. And still thinking about that horrible smell makes me  gag again. I cant stand the smell of oil at the moment.. other foods give me a hard time too, but oil.. that really makes me throw up. Ok I have to change subject now because my stomach is not happy by just thinking about it.

Tomorow I am going to the doc to get my urine checked because im a little worried I have  a bladder infection and I don’t want to end up in the hospital again like when I was pregnant from my daughter and never noticed the bladder infection.

My daughter currently stays at my moms and she’s having a good time there. She will be back  before new years tho to celebrate that with us. Its nice n quiet but I really miss her. Ok so far this week, next week i will bring another update about my pregnancy.

We are still trying to get a backup but I have little to no hope that we will be able to retrieve one. I feel sad, all my posts are gone.. Posts about certain days that are special to me, like the day when I meet Antonio the first time irl, birthdays en lets not forget, my wedding day and what went on before the happy day. All those posts are gone.. I can rebuild a large part of the blog, but those posts I never get back and yes I can write down the info again but the feelings and emotions  of that moment when I first wrote it.. I cant put those back in the text.

Little by little I will rebuild my blog although at the moment I don’t no where to start.. As you can see if you look arround, Antonio allready made a start with it and put a few things back. The easiest part is putting those things back that I have a back up of somehow, like my tutorials, it was very time consuming to restore those a couple weeks ago and altho I’m not looking forward to it, I will restore them again. Also a couple of posts that came from my old blog on a  different adress.. I can bring back I hope. I have not checked yet but I most certainly hope and think  that these are still there. The lyrics and my poems ofcourse I can put back up too. The informational posts I made for the getting back in shape category and the household tips I can bring back too although be it most likely not excactly the same. I dont have a back up of any the posts that I wrote directly into this blog first time.

Ofcourse rebuilding my blog will take time allong with bringing back some old posts I will also ofcourse continu with posting new ones. I will most likely put some of the happenigns that you could of read about on my blog bring back in a  different shape.. Right now I’m thinking about the story of me and Antonio and how we meet. I’m planning to bring that back in some sort of a mini serie where I will tell the story in little parts with a few little stories about events that happened in that context inbetween. I will put that in a different category because I think that deserves its own  special place 🙂 after all its A special story. Ofcourse if any of you readers want toadd somethign to my blog or have a story that you want to share with my visitors then by all means dont hesitate and contact me through the contactform or leave me a message in the shout box at the left side on this page 🙂

Things change in time.. with time.. Not always just because… Often one has to work hard to get to a certain point… Building up things is  not always as easy… In life one builds up many aspects of life… friendships… sometimes they come and go.. others are for life… relationships… there arent many  who never had more as one relationship with someone… often you dont marry the first person you fall in love with and share your lifes forever… Career is something else we build up..  we get experience with everything we do.. SometimesI feel as I have not achieved anything.. yet when I look back I see all the battles i faught and won.. often it meant to crawl back up and start over again… I am 33 years old now and I wonder where i will be next year.. will I have achieved more? did i climbed up again? Is there gonna be another battle nearby that I have to overcome? I dont know.. neither do you whats comming at ya…  I have been at all sorts of lvls in my live.. from the bottom of the well till halfway the mountain… I never made it to the top… And you know.. it doesn’t always matter where we are at in life… what matters is most how we got there… who where there with us on our journey… because at the end of the road… what matters most is the people arround you…

Thats easy to say.. yet at the same time not so easy… When I look at my life now.. I am no where near where I want to be… I dont know if i am ever gone be there.. life gives and takes.. and it is for us to take it up or not whats been offered…

I think I have finally reached a lvl in my life where i know excactly what I want… I want to be home… and share my life with the man I love and take care of our children.. Nothing fancy.. just a quiet nice family life… I dont need to be rich or famous… I dont need to have a blooming career and be a top bussines person… I just want to be happy and that doesnt take much.. yet.. to achieve that what i call not much.. seems impossible…  sighs…

que sera sera..
whatever will be will be..
the futures not ours to see..
que sera sera..

Hugs ela

I discovered Ebay…

ahuh, I did. And now the Ebay fever had hit me, I wat to sell things too! In the last few weeks I have been looking arround my house and putting the things aside that I really can not use anymore but that are still in great condition. Clothes from my daughter who have gotten too small and only have been worn once or twice, even clothes from me that I didnt really liked after all.

I also discovered i have a limited edition hallmark hazy days collectible. Only 5000 where made and mine is numbered 1268. Does that mean I actualy have something thats worth something decent? You understand what this means? It means that I have to go google and find outif they are actualy worth something. I remember exactly how I got it.

I was working in a big warehouse downtown of a cute lil city. Once every year they had a great sale for the people who worked there. All sorts of things where being sold lottery way. which means we all went arround looking at the things we wanted to buy. Then we all got as many numbers as items where written down. Each lot costed 1 euro. Then the numbers where being called.. if your number was called you would get to go get one of the items you wanted.. If someone else wanted the same and had his/her number picked before you, too bad.. then you simply had to get something else or nothing. Ofcourse as lucky as I am my numbers came at the end and there wasnt anything left that I wanted really. But these things where really cheap now and some normally costed up to 100 euros. So I simply picked some things that where cute and I could use somehow or make someone else happy with. At the end of this lottery there was one last raffle. All tickets went in a hat and 3 where picked. Three numbers where picked and three people went home with free tickets to the coolest circus in the Netherlands. Quite expensive tickets aswell may i add.. However.. again I wasnt so lucky to go home with them. I did go home with this hallmark limited edition collectible lazy days some little things for my little girl a few gifts for some other people and only a few euros lighter.

Thats how I got that Hallmark limited edition collectible. I dont know if I am going to sell it, but its just standing arround and I dont really have anything with it, its cute but… I am a fairy/elf kinda person 🙂

Now on to the next thing, Guinea pigs, I dont have anythingwith those either.. except, I bought the cutest lil pink baby guinea pigs ever! No they are not real, they are not even for me but for two wonderful girls who i am sure will love these guinea pigs. They are beanie babies by the way. See I do love cute things. just not for me to keep 🙂 I rather make other people happy with cute little things 🙂

Well so much for today! Till next time!