A little about me
Once, a little while after I meet someone new, that person asked me, wondered about why I didn’t asked much about him. If I wasn’t interested to get to know him better. I never really realized that I don’t do that. Not just in that occasion, I just don’t do that. I never really found myself comfortable asking other people directly about their personal life.
When people share themself, parts of their personal life with me, I see that as a gift and that makes it more special and beautiful to me, especially in this case where I had ( and still have) romantic feelings for this man. I also listen to what is being left unsaid and yes if a topic is brought up and I do have a question about it I will ask, sometimes more carefully then another time. But I will. That’s what I told him and how I truly do feelabout this.
Thinking more about this brings me even more to the why. Maybe it’s got to do with the lack of boundaries I always had in my life and I don’t want to place someone else in a position I don’t like to be. I basically always answer if someone asks me something. I have recently started to learn that I don’t have to. I am allowed to simply let the other now that I don’t want to answer or that it’s none of their business basically. Mind ya I’m still in the process of learning this but it’s coming. Understanding this now more made me also realize why he thought of it maybe as desintrest. He probably had not realized either the connection of me keeping that distance where on the other hand I am very open about myself and my lack of boundaries.
When I know someone much longer I don’t have such issues with asking personal questions though. But yes that’s usually only after I know someone a significant amount of time.
